C.H.U.D.s waiting to pounce on their unsuspecting prey (photo zombietime)
But they get too bold...How's the view from pepper spray heaven fellas?
Don't stop the music!
Type: CHUDs on Parade
Location of Outbreak: Denver DNC Protests, Spotted by the PPC
Description of Attack: Trouble a-brewin in Denver was predicted weeks ago, and it appears to have manifested even before the actual DNC has started. Besides speeches from fake Native-American Ward Churchill on how North America is under military occupation and clowns in bandanas heckling Fox News, a sign was spotted calling for solidarity with murderous thug Muqtada al-Sadr. Sadr's Mahdi Army is responsible for massacring Sunnis in Baghdad, engaging in massive corruption and intimidation throughout southern Iraq, and killing our troops with advanced weaponry provided by Iran. He is a bit of an unsavory character, so it is confusing why protesting CHUDs would want to align themselves with the cleric, unless they wanted to trade their fashionable "Defend Denver" t-shirts for the not-so-cool abaya.
Prognosis: Some CHUDs feel so strongly against "AmeriKKKa", that they align themselves ideologically with any group that also strongly opposes America (even violently). This is typical CHUD behavior that was evident in Vietnam with Hanoi Jane perched side-by-side with the NVA enemy while an active war was happening. While the riff-raff in Denver might not have the financial capability to fly to Qom, Iran to "Hang with Muqtada", they make catchy signs to parade around in front of the media to demoralize our service members. Also, they can only align themselves with America's enemies by proxy, since direct combat with the military would result in an ass-whooping not seen since Caeser conquered Gaul.
Location of Outbreak: National Memorial Cemetery of Arizona, Depicted on local CBS affiliate (h/t Jacki)
Description of Attack: Jacki writes in that the veterans cemetery in Arizona is being vandalized by low-class goons. CBS in Phoenix explains:
Vandals are stealing headstones, ripping down signs and plastering graffiti on pillars at the Valley's Veteran's National Memorial Cemetery, Phoenix police said."Well, they tried to pry this off the wall,' said Wayne Ellis, cemetery director. Ellis was pointing to a spot where vandals tried to pry open a memorial marker where the remains of one of Arizona's U.S. war veterans is enshrined.Ellis said it's the latest incident in string of crimes targeting the cemetery off Cave Creek Road in north Phoenix.Over the past several weeks, there have been at least a half dozen random acts of vandalism, Ellis said. The crimes range from grave markers stolen to inscripted memories shattered, he said.
Judging by the offensiveness of these crimes, you'd wonder if these Thug CHUDs would engage with necrophiliac acts with their mother like Ed Gein.
Prognosis: Like Alex in A Clockwork Orange vandalism and violence is often done for no rational reason, yet symbolizes a disturbing trend in our modern society. When even the cemeteries of our veterans are desecrated, it pretty much opens the door for anything else to be destroyed in a fit of nihilism. They are filming porns at memorials in Europe, and there doesn't seem to be any respect left.
Location of Outbreak: EZ Reading Money Matters Blog (h/t NavyCS)
Description of Attack: While the cowardly Taliban continues to engage in terrorist attacks against civilians and ISAF troops in Afghanistan, they would be ecstatic to know that they have a cadre of supporters back here in the states. Elaine Meinel cheers on the heroic terrorists:
US Airfarce bombed French surrender monkeys in Afghanistan. HAHAHA. Why are the French there in the first place? Or the US Airforce? Time to talk about mountain tribes, imperial warfare and the many ironies of history.
The editors of the New York Times are utterly unable to explain why it is vital for the US to expand the eternal war in Afghanistan. Usually, we win wars by nuking civilian populations or carpet bombing industrial rivals. But how many ball bearing factories does Afghanistan have? How many airplane factories? Or tank factories does this tiny, landlocked, poor country have?
Sarkozy is a 100% Zionist. He will kill endless numbers of French soldiers to gain global power so Israel can crush the hardy, difficult Palestinians. The US has bombed many people who were the wrong people so far in the mountain fighting in Afghanistan.
This endless humiliation of the recently fallen and speculation done in sentence fragments continues on perpetually, and reminds one of the deranged homeless person on the street that you dish out 35 cents to leave you alone.
Prognosis: Elaine, who is unsurprisingly endorsed by CHUD-infested DU, reminds me of a Lyndon Larouche protege. These people rail about being Henry Kissinger being a "British Agent", have for decades warned of an economic collapse that hasn't happened, and once beat up the opposition with nunchucks during something called Operation "Mop Up". They thrive on human misery, endlessly driveling on about future suffering for the human race if we don't subscribe to their nutty ideals. Her bio, printed at the bottom of this interview, indicates that she lives on a mountain with a bunch of animals. Hopefully she stays there.
Location of Outbreak: Alternet, Highlighted by RNC (h/t McClatchy Watch)
Description of Attack: A bundler from Code Pink, who was gotten her mitts on $50-$100K for the Obama campaign, is a full blown C.H.U.D. She attended the World Tribunal on Iraq, which gave us such ideological abortions as the brutal insurgency in Iraq was justified and that we humble Americans should support the Iraqi resistance that actively kills our troops. Her whole wretched statement can be seen on this 2005 Alternet article:
For the Record: Suicide Bombings against Civilians (a common tactic by the Iraqi Insurgency) shall now be called Love Bombs!
Prognosis: Jodie Evans is so wrapped up in her anti-war/anti-America spiel, that she will even support America's enemies who utilize the most brutal of tactics which deliberately target civilians (and American troops). She follows in the long, treasonous line of Jane Fonda supporting the NVA, Noam Chomsky supporting Hezbollah, and other various riff-raff that sit safely within America's borders free to spew their bile. Tell Obama to give the damn money back. It's just simple politics. Ron Paul once took money from a white supremacist organization, and look how it turned out for him (I think he's rummaging through the CHUD Busters garbage can out in the street right now for dinner).
Location of Outbreak: Roseanne's Wacky Blog (h/t The Sniper)
Description of Attack: Members of the cinematic industry are traditionally liberal, and deviating from that paradigm, as Jon Voight did and Angelina Jolie might, can subject accomplished actors to horrendous criticism from washed-up losers like Roseanne Barr. Roseanne offers her intelligent insight on the current Hollywood political climate by associating the refugees that Brangelina try to help with victims of a right-wing military conspiracy. In her fit of rage, she spews out a grammatically incorrect C.H.U.D. attack in order to bolster her confusing point:
Aren't you supposed to be somewhat enlightened, or do you not know that the african daughter you hold in every picture had parents who suffered and died because of the republican party's worldwide economic assault on africa over the last few decades since reagan? whaaaa...??????!!!! (for that matter, the thai and cambodian sons you are photo'd with weekly too who's pictures you sell to raise money to help the poor? Their families are victims of America's right wing military incursions too.)
For the record, the U.S. military has long held good relations with Thailand, and even assisted in providing humanitarian assistance during the devastating tsunami in late 2004. As for Cambodia, much of their suffering was due to the brutality of the Khmer Rouge regime under Pol Pot, generally viewed as a "left-wing" military incursion. Of course, Roseanne probably isn't interested in these facts, just as she isn't interested in properly capitalizing the beginning of sentences.
Prognosis: Presumably, Roseanne seems to be attempting to bolster support for presumptive Democratic nominee, Senator Obama, with her post. But she is doing a bit of disservice to him, as she references him as having a "bone through his nose" and once quipped on the Huffington Post about his "jew problem". This frighteningly bigoted world view means CHUD-like characteristics are just around the corner. Dirty Harry summarizes her motivation when he states: "What a sad, small, unfulfilled life she must lead to demean herself in such a way hoping to, just once more and for a fleeting moment, feel the comforting warmth in the spotlight of attention again. What a pitiable figure that she can’t be satisfied with the fame she had and the wealth she has." Or a more simple, yet appropriate observation is made by TSO with "Shaddap Dummy".
Type: CHUDs on Parade
Location of Outbreak: Times Square, NYC (posted on YouTube)
Description of Attack: The 90s-era Giuliani purge of all things undesirable on Times Square apparently forgot to ship off the Black Israelites to Jersey. A NY Times article from a decade ago notes how they have continued to set up shop in NYC, advocating for the enslavement of white people. This bit must've gotten old, because now they are stepping up their CHUD attacks on Marines, regardless of race. CHUD Busters watched the video so you don't have to:
- 0:25 Claims that the Army Beret has satanic connotations
- 1:26 Poster of A-bomb with "America Shall Soon Be Destroyed" prominently displayed
- 2:29 "Fuck America, Fuck the Marines"
- 3:30 WTC buildings came down from missiles?!? Uh-oh, we've gone into Truther territory
- 4:10 Creepy Revelations quotes about the apocalypse
- 8:00 Walking on picture of Jesus
Prognosis: NYC has long been known for bringing the crazy to the streets, but it is also very friendly to our servicemembers, and this Marine should consider himself protected from CHUD attacks while out in public. But he should be fearful of encountering these people in a concealed location. The YouTube user, HARMAGADWAN, has a repertoire of public shenanigans in NYC, and his corny, monochromatic website has photoshopped images that imply all white people are caveman, World War III is upon us (includes Revalations quotes), and that the image of Jesus has been corrupted. The antics of this group are almost like watching a self-parody, and it's very hard to view their CHUDistic affront with any sort of seriousness.
Location of Outbreak: BushwickBK, Senior Editor Jeremy Sapienza
Description of Attack: Often, CHUDs can get so beat down by their counterparts that don't dwell in a sewer of filth, that they go into hiding for months and even years. Jeremy Sapienza wrote the following elegant eulogy for the 2000 KIA servicemember in Iraq back in 2005 at Project for the New Anarchist Century:
Well, it seems the 2000th slackjawed yokel/fresh-from-Chihuahua tomato-picker/"urban" slum-dweller baby-killer has finally bit it in Iraq. That's 2000 less future homeless junkie serial-killer rapist petty thief semi-crippled nutjobs to be subsidized/suffered by the productive people of these United States. To paraphrase the neocons: "Better to get them over there before they get us over here."
I have been saying for a while, the only good thing about wars is that they attract the most worthless illiterate dirtbag shitsack welfare-suckers to be scraped off the bottom of society's pot and flung away like the human trash they are to be erased from the gene pool in a foreign place.His subtlety in CHUDology is not very apparent, and many in the blogosphere were not very thrilled with his violent outbursts. Jeremy was summarily booted off the already CHUD-riddled websites of Lew Rockwell and AntiWar.com and rarely heard of or seen since.
However, he has revitalized himself in 2008 as a hipster blogger in Brooklyn at BushwickBK, discussing such important issues in a time of war as blurry photos of Susan Sarandon walking the streets of New York, a new awning for a falafel shop, and the real estate market for douchey white people that would never talk to you because you don't listen to the White Stripes. Note to Mr. Sapienza: It's hard to hide behind your newfound beat, when the internet can provide a disturbing look into your online past.
Prognosis: Jeremy clearly has a view of an American ideal that can be found in the corners of the NYC burroughs, and everything else is simply "bullshit" to him. Consider that he refferred to his recent trip to Orlando as a town full of "hicks and spics", let that be a testament to his intolerant world. Servicemembers cannot exist in Jeremy's America, so he uses his limited pulpit to denigrate them in an attempt to make the country look like an old post from Stuff White People Like.
Wek dropped C.H.U.D. Busters a tip about American Airlines charging too much for servicemember bags headed for the front, but AA decided to implement new policy to waive the fee. Good for them, because no respectable organization would want to be perceived as bunch of CHUDs.
Location of Outbreak: Coney Island, NY Post Reports (h/t Moonbattery)
Description of Attack: Our beloved Marine Corps is probably the last branch of service low-class CHUDs would want to tango with. However, when two marines tried to help a damsel in distress out in Coney Island, a mob of 50 thugs clearly outnumbers them. The NY Post reports on this violence against our service members:
"It wasn't our intention to get into a fight," said Bukler. "We said, 'Let the girl go, and we'll leave.' We told them, 'Stop.'
"She was screaming, and all we did was look to help her. I got a bottle smashed over my head, and after that, I started fighting. But I got beat down.
"I was getting my ass kicked by 50 people."
Their friend called Olenyev's brother, Ivan, 22.
"When I showed up, there were a lot of people there, people on the left and people on the right, and then - 'Boom!' - I got hit and passed out," Ivan told The Post from his hospital bed.
Police sources said he was pounded senseless by 240-pound Timothy Dixon, 23, who was swinging a metal baseball bat.Good thing it wasn't that chick gang from The Warriors...the Lizzies.
Prognosis: Many of our service members are from rough neighborhoods, and have to deal with the local riff-raff despite their honorable service. Fortunately, none of the Marines were killed in this confrontation, like Jamiel Shaw in Los Angeles, whose Mom was a soldier. The actions of thugs was probably based on a depraved view of humanity, and not simply an anti-military attack, but they probably wouldn't have been any less forgiving if they knew their victims were Marines.
Location of Outbreak: Wilmington, North Carolina, The Club Scene (h/t NavyCS)
Description of Attack: Short, high-and-tight haircuts make service members stand out like a sore thumb amidst a sea of gel-haired douchebags usually found in the club scene. While the competition to meet the ladies might be fierce in the dimly-lit backrooms of Wilmington, some club owners and bouncers won't even give them a fightin' chance as they are denied access under some weird antebellum law. WHQR in Wilmington explains:
On this night Navy Corpsmen Kenny Preudhomme and Chris Burns stand beside their car in downtown Wilmington and spray themselves with cologne. They're dressed in polo shirts and jeans, and blend in with the civilians on the sidewalk. Only their extra-short haircuts flag them as service members . . . and that haircut might be a liability. They've heard about bouncers in Wilmington turning away Marines and sailors. Preudhomme explains.
"If the bouncer's not having a good night and he sees military members, he's going to automatically think we're going to start something, just try to ruin someone's night."A bouncer can probably fall back on a law that says if you aren't a member of that bar, you can't get in. Most military personnel are in town for one or two nights, and the law says you have to wait three days to become a member.
While it's one thing to support the troops with a yellow magnet, it's quite another matter when the civilian population has to interact with them, where stereotypes clearly run rampant.
Prognosis: Despite the fact that military service members have a lower crime rate than the average civilian population here and abroad, business owners stereotype regulation haircuts with drunken hooliganism and barroom brawls. Despite robust support for the military from North Carolina, many of the same constituents could develop a NIMBY-like attitude towards unsupervised service members frequenting their establishments. Kudos to NavyCS for locating this brand of CHUD that many service members have to deal with while blowing off steam on the weekends.
Update: Ms. Kiyum provides information on a recent meeting with the Marines and Wilmington business owners.
Type: C.H.U.D. Benedict Arnold
Location of Outbreak: USS Carl Vinson, depicted in Military Times
Description of Attack: Chaplains are some of the most respected officers in the Navy, and when the chain-of-command doesn't know how to solve your problem, they usually advise you to see "The Chaplain" (regardless of your religious affiliation). But LT Dillman stands accused of violating this sacred trust, and putting his holy mitts all over two young, enlisted sailors while stationed on the USS Carl Vinson (CVN-70). Some profiles in creepiness include:
- inappropriate fraternization (that's military jargon which includes fucking) with two enlisted female sailors
- threatening to have one sailor's parents audited by the IRS
- summoning a female sailor to his office while he was in his underoos
- falsely claiming that he was involved in combat in Iraq and even shot!
- saying he was the most powerful man on the ship next to the skipper
Prognosis: At a time when the publicly is increasingly incensed about sexual assault in uniform, this man is certainly not helping rectify the problem. As Brandon Friedman notes "...it is a problem for which we should have zero tolerance. All troops must feel safe within the ranks." Officers are supposed to "set the standard" in the military in the hopes that everyone else will follow suit. Unfortunately, acting like the creepy old guy at a sorority mixer has the potential to turn the Navy into a floating version of Benny Hill.
Type: Conspiracy C.H.U.D.
Location of Outbreak: Jew Watch, the whole creepy site
Description of Attack: Frank Weltner is an unsavory character. He was issued an injunction in the state of Missouri for deceptively soliciting funds for his hate site by saying it was for Hurricane Katrina donations, he frequently rails against the "ZOG machine" (which should set off your crazydar), and his website reminds cyber denizens of the early days of the internet when everything was midget porn, Star Trek fan fiction , and bizarre conspiracy sites. But he took a break on Memorial Day from bashing our Jewish friends to bashing the troops.
Memorial to America's Death Video:
- 2:30 I am the dead American from WWI...dead for nothing
- 3:32 I am the sucker that died on the beach at Omaha, I am the sucker went down in a submarine, I am the sucker who went down in the tanker ships
- 5:01 When I did take up arms for my country it was not for my country, it was for some New World Order that we were not even told about it
Prognosis: Mr. Wetzner's irrational hatred of an enemy that doesn't exist, such as the cabal dreamed up in the much debunked Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion, points to the fact that he has a disturbed mind. This may be one of the reasons he was banned from YouTube. Also, C.H.U.D. Busters is pretty sure he was the old codger hosting the Pickle-Eating contest at Sturgis last year.
This is the guy who once said "We've killed over 400,000 of their citizens". C.H.U.D. Busters has a feeling that this movie is going to totally suck ass.
Type: Dotsam and Netsam C.H.U.D.
Location of Outbreak: Netflix, Reviews (h/t Jacki)
Description (from Jacki): I was checking out military documentaries on Netflix and saw Frontline: Bad Voodoo's War. Being a long time fan of JP and I went to add it to my queue. I read the "reviews" and this one was charming:
I guess one shouldn't expect much else from a guy whose name on Netflix is AntiNeoCon.
His other reviews are revealing:
The Peace! - Well done. Just too bad Americans won't wake up and inform themselves with facts like this. Unfortunately, facts are not a part of the American diet, nor are they offered to us in any meaningful way by the "mainstream media". Civic Duty - An interesting fictional portrayal of the irrational frenzy that people in our society go into as a result of government propoganda, fearmongering and indoctrination. Imagine, they were able to stir an entire country into a similar frenzy to build support for the Iraq war. In the Face of Evil: Reagan's War - Propoganda piece. Portrays the imperialist policies of Ronald reagan, including support of terrorists, death squads, etc. against innocent people who pose no harm to us as some sort of righteous cause. Letters from Iwo Jima - True, there is no moral equivalency between Japan and the Us during WWII. They attacked our military installation at Pearl Harbor without civilian targets... we firebombed Tokyo, and nuked Hiroshima and Nagasaki, disintegrating hundreds of thousands of TARGETED civilians Operation Enduring Freedom - Pure propoganda garbage. Skip it unless you want to see it for purposes of assessing the Bush propoganda campaign.
Prognosis: Despite spelling propaganda incorrectly on 5 separate occasions, Anti-NeoCon is well versed in the pathetic art of trolling. This ensures that honest-to-goodness Americans like Jacki can't rent a damn netflix movie or even go to a social networking site without being hassled by low-grade CHUDs. Clearly, people who want to rent the superb Bad Voodoo's War would be interested in military culture and supporting the troops. Therefore, the trolling CHUD will simply denigrate our servicemembers as a way to further their misanthropic ambitions and upset the common user. Like the popular girls at their high school, it is best to ignore these trolls as they spread their hate and discontent for not getting on the varsity Chess team. Thanks to Jacki for the tip and stay safe out there.
Location of Outbreak: Seattle P-I, Comments
Description of Attack: Seafair took place this weekend in Seattle, which showcases America's beloved Blue Angels amongst other fun-filled activities. The Seattle P-I advised the locals to not bother calling 911 due to the booming sounds of freedom, as some weenies usually whine about their cats getting scared. But it was all too expected that a C.H.U.D. would appear to accuse the Blue Angels of conducting PsyOps on the American populace. From Whatshername on this thread:
The "Blue Angels of Death" are precision-strike fighter killing machines and the aerobatics shows are military psychological war dressed up as breathtaking-eardrum shattering technical bravado to whip up patriotic support for u.s.global war-making and slaughtering.
The C.H.U.D. also links to this old Time article, which C.H.U.D. Busters hears connects the dots between a family outdoor event in WA state and every single war crime since Attila the Hun.
Prognosis: WhatsHerName is an all-too-familiar example of a Trotskyite troll. Instead of handing out terribly written pamphlets advocating revolution and getting booted out of Russia by Stalin, the modern Trotskyite pollutes the comments section of mainstream media outlets like Seattle P-I. This is evident by her comments on a Stabucks thread where she calls the management of Starbucks "imperialist-zionist gangsters". Clearly unaware that the Cold War ended about 20 years ago, expect WhatsHerName to continue her propaganda until she takes the proverbial revolutionary dirt nap.